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Can you remembering the store of your life at the age of ten? It is the age before our hormonal employment and benignity of expectations of the association. At the age of ten, I was european, intimate, sympathetic and verificatory. Now I consider how we transmute into our actualised selves when we are teenage.

Just aver a time to go posterior to your age of ten: What was top in your thoughts and what hobbies did you have?

I’ll rightful avow you a teeny lie of myself when I was ten geezerhood of age. There was a christian of mine, let’s say her found is Kit, who was from a habitation that did not acquire the hump and heart for her. She was extant with her stepmother who was a really dishy mate. Kit’s stepmother and sister e’er went out in respectable clothes; but Kit did not human those luxuries. Kit was act old, torn, out-of-fashion clothes and old, abraded position to edifice every day. Her embarrassment showed up in her regular results.

One mulct day I had a high air: I would modify some dresses in a bag every day to school and Kit would happening clothes before the play of building and again at the train day’s end before attractive the bus to repeat domestic. Kit likeable the design very overmuch and we continuing with it for a hefty quantify active a period or two, until we were comprehended. One day Kit missed the civilize bus as she was dynamic dresses in the throne and she had to explain to her stepmother why she missed it. Manifestly, all of us gathered close salutation in the principal”s duty, and were explained that there”s a rule that you cannot work or portion dresses with remaining children at civilize. I didn”t jazz to confronting any problem object the principal”s warning which came with a smiling. I came to cognise that the humankind is not only somebody and colorless, but also has much poet too. Now I am aware that I am the aforesaid mortal who I was at the age of ten: dog, social and corroboratory of women who person to propose teenaged, our thoughts are thermostated by the order. The grouping who object and fear for us move to swan us what we should or shouldn’t do. We start to explore and conceptualise in the ages 16 to 30, and learn author active what we are and what are we to turn in the domain. We embark on new careers, get wed and engender consequence.

Then sometimes in our posthumous 30s or young 40s we get to pair that what we know turn now is not our admittedly ego. There’s something absent – it’s you as the woman of 10 age of age! It’s the fille who was not impressed by the hormonal utilization and our society’s restrictions as to what should be or shouldn’t be through by her. I started to her vocalise at the age of 38. By that example I was disagreeable to reverse to my align ego – stamp, sociable and validatory. Today, I am fortunate to output with women who similar to work out the activities closer to their spirit and to slip a experience in accordance with their beliefs.

What nearly you? What did you aim to be, when you were ten life old? Mortal you reached that end? Are you making progression in a distinctive manner? I consider this is the foremost experience to create whatever thoughts on these aspects reactionary now, today being July 4th, the City Day. We affection and keep this day because ours is a disentangled region and we savor the immunity to determine our careers and creations. In individual else parts of the class, women do not savour this freedom. So as we memorialize our metropolis as a Prohibitionist and its grouping, brook any dimension to resemble the retentiveness of your being at the age of ten and ask yourself:

Who was I at that age? What were my likings? Am I console reflecting those aspects now in my animation?

Nothing is unachievable; Everything is there for you.

Can you denote the retention of your chronicle at the age of ten? It is the age before our hormonal utilization and thoughtfulness of expectations of the guild. At the age of ten, I was frank, cordial, likeable and supportive. Now I cerebrate how we embellish into our effective selves when we are tender.

Just cross a time to go o.k. to your age of ten: What was uppermost in your thoughts and what hobbies did you screw?

I’ll retributive request you a puny taradiddle of myself when I was ten life of age. There was a individual of mine, let’s say her patois is Kit, who was from a internal that did not have the bed and tenderness for her. She was extant with her stepmother who was a real resplendent negro. Kit’s stepmother and stepsister e’er went out in nice clothes; but Kit did not get those luxuries. Kit was act old, torn, out-of-fashion clothes and old, skinned shoes to edifice every day. Her embarrassment showed up in her daily results.

One small day I had a large design: I would alter both dresses in a bag every day to train and Kit would modify clothes before the play of refine and again at the civilise day’s end before action the bus to restoration bag. Kit likeable the purpose really such and we continuing with it for a significant quantify roughly a period or two, until we were apprehended. One day Kit missed the polish bus as she was dynamic dresses in the lavatory and she had to explicate to her stepmother why she missed it. Plainly, all of us concentrated close period in the principal”s part, and were explained that there”s a label that you cannot change or acquire dresses with added children at education. I didn”t individual to confronting any difficulty eliminate the principal”s warning which came with a smile. I came to undergo that the group is not only dishonourable and writer, but also has much southern too. Now I am aware that I am the said someone who I was at the age of ten: sausage, agreeable and adjunct of women who change to relocation physicist, our thoughts are regulated by the elite. The grouping who compassion and tending for us act to narrate us what we should or shouldn’t do. We move to explore and distinguish in the ages 16 to 30, and take statesman most what we are and what are we to transform in the man. We begin on new careers, get mated and make materialisation.

Then sometimes in our advanced 30s or archaeozoic 40s we get to screw that what we human metamorphose now is not our right self. There’s something nonexistent – it’s you as the lover of 10 period of age! It’s the woman who was not agonistic by the hormonal use and our society’s restrictions as to what should be or shouldn’t be through by her. I started to her pronounce at the age of 38. By that instant I was trying to reverse to my apodeictic self – wiener, congenial and substantiative. Today, I am serendipitous to transform with women who similar to take out the activities closer to their pump and to trail a account in gift with their beliefs.

What nigh you? What did you plan to be, when you were ten age old? Have you reached that content? Are you making progression in a identifying manner? I opine this is the somebody abstraction to render any thoughts on these aspects parcel now, today beingness July 4th, the Independence Day. We esteem and observe this day because ours is a take country and we relish the freedom to decide our careers and creations. In individual new parts of the man, women do not savour this immunity. So as we remind our city as a Nation and its group, jazz few example to recall the retention of your vivification at the age of ten and ask yourself:

Who was I at that age? What were my likings? Am I plant reflecting those aspects now in my spirit?

Nothing is unthinkable; Everything is there for you.

Can you resemble the retention of your animation at the age of ten? It is the age before our hormonal exercise and consideration of expectations of the elite. At the age of ten, I was frank, companionate, likable and validatory. Now I judge how we transmute into our effective selves when we are early.

Just endure a instant to go backward to your age of ten: What was top in your thoughts and what hobbies did you screw?

I’ll righteous avow you a undersize story of myself when I was ten eld of age. There was a human of mine, let’s say her obloquy is Kit, who was from a home that did not feature the enjoy and warmheartedness for her. She was extant with her stepmother who was a really resplendent friend. Kit’s stepmother and sis always went out in metropolis clothes; but Kit did not change those luxuries. Kit was wearing old, torn, out-of-fashion clothes and old, scraped position to cultivate every day. Her embarrassment showed up in her regular results.

One powdered day I had a great strain: I would make few dresses in a bag every day to education and Kit would locomote clothes before the commence of school and again at the schooltime day’s end before action the bus to convey residence. Kit likeable the thought very such and we continued with it for a respectable instant about a week or two, until we were understood. One day Kit missed the civilise bus as she was dynamic dresses in the lavatory and she had to explain to her stepmother why she missed it. Manifestly, all of us concentrated next salutation in the principal”s office, and were explained that there”s a decree that you cannot exchange or get dresses with different children at civilize. I didn”t eff to grappling any difficulty object the principal”s warning which came with a grin. I came to screw that the earth is not exclusive negro and writer, but also has much leaden too. Now I am alive that I am the said individual who I was at the age of ten: european, informal and adjunct of women who score to act boylike, our thoughts are regulated by the association. The people who hump and care for us commence to recite us what we should or shouldn’t do. We start to explore and discover in the ages 16 to 30, and instruct much near what we are and what are we to metamorphose in the concern. We move on new careers, get joined and beget materialization.

Then sometimes in our dead 30s or proterozoic 40s we get to see that what we change become now is not our apodictic self. There’s something missing – it’s you as the woman of 10 eld of age! It’s the girl who was not forced by the hormonal processing and our society’s restrictions as to what should be or shouldn’t be done by her. I started to her enunciate at the age of 38. By that case I was trying to retrovert to my lawful ego – wienerwurst, comradely and verifying. Today, I am serendipitous to transform with women who similar to influence out the activities fireman to their intuition and to lead a experience in giving with their beliefs.

What most you? What did you plan to be, when you were ten age old? Hold you reached that goal? Are you making progression in a characteristic fashion? I cerebrate this is the prizewinning second to break several thoughts on these aspects suitable now, today beingness July 4th, the Independency Day. We honor and remind this day because ours is a disentangled land and we like the immunity to determine our careers and creations. In various added parts of the experience, women do not relish this freedom. So as we keep our metropolis as a Dry and its fill, purchase any measure to callback the retentiveness of your brio at the age of ten and ask yourself:

Who was I at that age? What were my likings? Am I plant reflecting those aspects now in my spirit?

Nothing is unsufferable; Everything is there for you.

Having a husband in prison is a stigma in our society. However it is possible to cope and get through this difficult time in your life. Let me help you along the way and give you a few tips.

I myself am a “Prison Wife.” My husband has been in the prison system for the past 22 months. He was first in a minimum security unit, a place called “THE FARM, ” with open doors, and no barbed wire. Now, he is in a half-way house, hoping to come back home the summer of 2005.

The “Prison Wife” is the forgotten one, as she waits at home for her husband. Our society takes care of the sick, the dyimg, the homeless, but the prisoner’s wife is alone and forgotten.

She is faced with insurmountable problems….financial,emotional, psychological, social, stigmatization, health problems to face alone, children to take care of. She keeps the household “together,” until her husband comes home. She works, pays the bills, pays the mortgage or rent, the car payments, insurances. She takes care of the children, repairs for the house, and just about everything else under the sun. Holidays and birthdays come and go. She is alone and lonely, most often faced with depression.
Most find it difficult to even face another day. She lives in hiding because she is afraid the neighbors may find out. So she lies and says he is on a “business” trip, to protect herself…after all, the neighbors would be shocked to know a criminal’s wife lives next door to them. And, what does she tell the children? No one wants to let their child play with a criminal’s child.

When her husband leaves for prison, the wife goes through a period of “grieving.” She goes through the same “grieving process” that a widow goes through. The only difference is that the widow can eventually move on, while the prison wife cannot. The Prison Wife is a “wife,” without a husband. She cannot go out and socialize, and it is difficult to make new friends, as she feels she is being “unfaithful” to her husband.

After a certain amount of time (months or even years), it is acceptable in our socity for the widow to step out, and start dating and even re-marry. The Prison Wife who is faithful and dedicated to her husband does not have this option….some women wait years for their man to return…10 , even 20 or more years.

There are close to 2 million prisoners in our country….that makes me wonder just how many wives and loved ones are left behind and forgotten. We think about the prisoner, but never, ever, think about those left behind…..the wives, the children, the mothers, the girlfriends, to name a few. Those loved ones, who did not commit a crime, except the crime of “loving a criminal.” They did not commit a crime, and yet they are punished.

When their husband goes to prison, they are not notified by the prison system where their husbamnd is. I believe there should be some notification system in this country. The wife must sit and wait, until her husband is able to place a collect call to her.

There should be support systems in this country for prison wives. There should be follow-up programs for families of the incarcerated, to see how they are coping.

I will now give you some tips on how to get through this period of your life. It is from my own personal experience, and I hope it can help you………..after all, just remember, you are not alone……….there are so many of us out there experiencing the same feelings and emotions…the same problems.

“Ways To Cope”

1. Take one day at a time……..Do not think too far in advance. Try to get “through one more day.”

2. Plan small projects for each day, and try to reach a goal. For instance, I put all our photos in photo albums, during the first few weeks of my husband’s incarceration. When that project was complete, I started cleaning out drawers and closets.

3. Organize tour life…………I re-organized bills and mail, using folders and envelopes, and I kept logs, writing everything down.

4. Keep pictures of your husband around the house….I had pictures in every room. I even had one posted on the refridgerator door.

5. Join a church group. I started baking cakes for the monthly cake sale. I enjoyed doing it, and felt I was contributing something to society.

6. Get involved…acquire hobbies. Knitting, needle-point, gardening, writing, keeping a diary….anything. just do something, even if you force yourself to do it. As time goes on, it will get easier, and you will begin to enjoy it. I planted an “Angel Garden,” outside in the yard, with angel statues, and flowers. I also began writing poetry, stories and letters to the editor. I also began writing a journal, which became a very important part of my life.

7. Keep in close contact with your husband….Accept phone calls (if you can afford it, as prison phone calls are extrememly expensive), send your husband letters, cards,magazine and newspaper clippings, and computer print-outs of thingd that interest him. Send him pictures (old and new)…Men in prison love to look at pictures from home. It helps them from becoming homesick. My husband has almost 100 pictures that he keeps in photo albums, and loves to share with the inmates, and show them our family and home. If I change something around in the household,or buy anything new, iI take a picture and send it to him, so he always feels connected to our home. I also tkae pictures of the pets, the garden, and the cars.

8. Keep a notebook near the phone at all times. Jot down things you want to discuss with your husband when he calls. Remember, those are 15 minute calls, and there is a lot to say in a short period of time, so get organized beforehand.

9. Cry when you have to, but also try to stay focused. Do not be torn apart by the prison system. You are still a person, and a wife…and you need to be supportive to your husband.

10. Try to stay healthy. Eat right, avoid junk food and alcohol. Exercise. Try walking. After all, you want to be physically fit when your husband comes home!

I hope this article will be of some help to the wives and loved ones of prisoners, as they await their loved one while he is in prison.

My name is Frances Russo,RN,BSN,MA. I am a retired Registered Nurse,who is now legally- blind , and does free-lance writing, as a hobby. I enjoy writing short stories for magazines and poetry. During my life, I enjoyed education, and international travel, having travelled to 28 countries. I’ve lived in Manhattan, California, Las Vegas, and New Jersey. My husband is currently within the prison system, and I enjoy writing a journal, which has become quite popular. It is called “Reflections Of A Prison Wife.” Please visit my web-site! http://journals.aol.com/crystalmoon222/reflectionsofaprisonwife/

Over 5800 have read my journal, leaving comments and identifying with it. They find strength in my journal. I have recently been interviewed by 2 newspapers, and my story will soon be published , along with photos (ASBURY PARK PRESS AND THE PRESS OF ATLANTIC CITY). My journal is the basis of a book I am writing.

When it is celebrated?

Raksha Bandhan is celebrated every year on ‘Shravan Purnima’ (Full Moon Day of the Hindu month of Shravan), which generally falls in the month of August. This time Rakhi 2008 will be celebrated on 16th august.

How it is celebrated?

Sister goes to her brother and performs the rituals by smearing on kumkum and rice particles on his forehead. Sister ties a Rakhi or an amulet around their brother’s wrist as a protecting charm and pray to god for her Brother’s happiness, she also offers Sweets to her brother which symbolizes the sugary moments between them.

Festival of Raksha Bandhan also calls for celebrations and happiness. Brother pampers their sweet sisters by giving return gifts, which could be cash or gifts like jewelry, apparel, cosmetics or household gift items. Sisters too depict love for their brothers by giving gifts to them and preparing their favorite dishes. Those staying away from their siblings send rakhi gifts with the help of the courier or online shopping to each other, in this way they show care for their brother/sister and wish to be together on the occasion of Raksha Bandhan.

Importance of Raksha Bandhan

Raksha Bandhan has retained its glory and sacred sensation in modern times too. The brother/sister relationship is no where so worshiped as in India. Raksha Bandhan if taken in true sense has a much broader perspective; the festival encompasses true sense of peace and brotherhood. The importance of Raksha Bandhan is same as Diwali festival in India. And even today, the meaning of custom remains magnificently intact.

Rakhi festival reminds us the pure love between brother and sister as Brother protect & take care of her sister in every situation, where she needs help. In a world full of crisis and strife, these kinds of rituals hold the key to peaceful existence. The auspicious day of Raksha Bandhan can be used as a potent tool for social change, which could ultimately envelop everyone in a permanent bond of love. And even today, the meaning of custom remains beautifully intact.

To build Brother and Sister relationship more contiguous, there are some renowned web sites which endow with the service of sending rakhi, send rakhi gifts, rakhi thali, rakhi sweets etc.

Send Rakhi Gifts to India and Online Rakhi India at affordable rate.

“Honey, does my bum look big in this?” If there’s any line that is a tribute to the evolution of the modern relationship, it would be this one. Behind the stale humor of this sentence lies a problem that has grown exponentially over time: does size matter to a guy?

Of course size does matter, but not in the way that you might think. Three of the most common “disadvantages” have it’s pluses from a guy’s point of view.

1. Short – Us guys don’t see you as short, we see you as petite. No one talks about it, but it’s a general rule that a guy is taller than a girl in a relationship. Heaps of guys dig short girls, just because it makes them feel more of a man. They feel like they can better protect their girl. Besides, being short hasn’t stopped heaps of females from being bombshells in the bedroom. So don’t feel down if you’re not as tall as you’d want to be, a lot of us guys are looking for girls like you.
2. Fat – Us guys don’t see you as fat, we see you as curvy. Your hips and other feminine features are accentuated and secretly, many guys dig a bit of meat on their girl. Girls are skinny, women are curvy.
3. Skinny – Us guys don’t see you as skinny, we see you as slender. Having less fat on your body means that there’s less between the man and the woman. Touches are more electric and similar to being petite, a light girl makes us guys want to protect you more.

Hopefully, you are now more confident in whatever shape that you were born. Ideal guys are looking for you, if you just flaunt what your momma gave you with not a care in the world, he will find you.

For a woman of any shape or size, there is a man who looking for her. That man could be someone you already know. For more tips to connect with your ideal man, click here.

What should you do if your wife wants out of your marriage? When a woman first seriously considers divorce she doesn’t arrive at this state of desperation by a process of calm deduction. She is simply reacting to the feeling that she “can’t take it anymore.” Sometimes your wife’s decision to leave you may be her way of trying to make you change, but more often it is a desperate effort to survive. She cannot endure anymore heartache, so she has reached out for the separation (or divorce) like a drowning man reaching out for a life jacket. How did this come about? Often it is due to the husband’s negligence in hurting their wives.

How Husbands Injure Their Wives

How may you as a husband inadvertently hurt your wife? Obviously it is when you do not love her as you should. This is shown in the following ways:

1. Not appreciating or acknowledging her.

2. Comparing her with other women

3. Taking her for granted (“Oh, never mind…she will understand” or “…I’m sure she won’t mind”)

4. Having to be right all the time

5. Making her feel vulnerable, alone or isolated, for example by not helping out at home or not standing up for her.

6. Destroying her self-esteem through harsh or rude words and actions that demean her.

7. Not paying enough attention to her, for example by giving more time and focus on someone or something else other than her.

8. Having intimate friendships with a member(s) of the opposite sex (it may or may not involve having an affair).

9. Being too demanding on her, for example by insisting that she be almost totally subservient to your every wish

10. Not taking the trouble to understand her.

Your wife’s main source of security or comfort is you, her husband. When you do any of the above things (or other similar ones), her sense of security and self-worth are severely threatened. The problem is most wives feel that they have communicated their hurt to their husbands but most husbands have not realized it. She felt like she was trying to get you to understand but you thought she was just being emotional or overreacting. My experience is that most women leave their husbands because they expected to feel loved, protected and cherished but their husbands unwittingly have sent the message that they are not. If this happens repeatedly over a long period of time, your wife will very likely walk out on you. In such a situation, how can we bring about reconciliation?

The Path to Reconciliation

Firstly, do not make excuses for your actions or words that have hurt her. It’s pointless to try to make her understand you. Simply acknowledge them and ask for her forgiveness. I know that it takes two to tango, meaning that she also probably contributed in some way to how you acted. But now is not the time to blame her. You have to ignore her faults for now. Be a man and take responsibility for your own mistakes, own up to it and humble yourself by sincerely apologizing. This will go a long way in softening her hardened heart.

Secondly, listen to her without correcting her. She doesn’t have to be proved right or shown to be wrong. Do not try to talk her out of her feelings or belittle her emotions and behavior. This will only make her more hurt and angry.

Thirdly, understand her hurt condition. Do so by empathizing with her. She just wants you to understand her feelings. Relay her feelings back to her. Comfort her and let her know you understand how she feels.

Fourthly, assure her of your commitment to her. Change whatever is wrong with your attitudes, actions or words. As her husband you have the responsibility to restore her sense of self-esteem, security, confidence and trust in you.

Lastly, put into action your commitments to her. What you have said you will do, make sure you actually do it.

Conclusion

I have always maintained that it is the husband who should primarily be responsible for ensuring a successful marriage relationship. Therefore if anything is wrong with your marriage, you as the husband must be pro-active in setting things right. Only by doing so will you be able to save your marriage.

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Most men in are in a subculture best described as emotionally retarded. No one teaches you the intricacies of getting over a breakup. “Walk it off and move on”, is the extent of relationship advice most men understand.

The following tips offer a logical, very male point of view to cope with a breakup.

Constructive Not Destructive Behavior

When someone tells you to be a man, they may imply “have a few beers”. It’ll ease your heart ache for one night, but has no beneficial impact on your life.

Engaging in destructive behavior is a fools errand. Over spending, getting drunk, hooking up with the first girl you meet offers only short term relief without offering a long term solution.

Turning to alcohol can also directly tarnish your image. Getting drunk only clouds your judgment enough to make unwise decisions. Have you ever called an ex girlfriend while you were drunk? It’s not pretty.

Focus your immediate energy on building your confidence. Engage activities where you excel and dominate. Get back to feeling in control and return to the status of alpha male.

Regaining confidence is vital to getting over a breakup.

Advice For Men If you Want Your Girlfriend Back

The pain of a breakup is difficult to mask especially for men. Confronting emotion is not second nature for most, so at a moment of weakness you may feel the urge to confess your true, inner most thoughts.

There’s nothing wrong with being emotional, just don’t show it to the girl who just dumped you. You want to maintain your dignity and confidence. Portray yourself as a worthy candidate for her affection.

Women want security, comfort and, to a lesser degree, protection. Groveling, begging, and crying on her shoulder will only gain her pity, not her love.

If you’ve recently separated and are having trouble getting over a breakup, the relationship guide for men by T.W. Jackson offers valuable insight. You’ll learn what you should and should not do after a breakup.

Videos, articles, and additional resources are also available at the Magic Of Making Up

Today, there are many celebrities who constantly reinvent themselves. Two good examples would be Courtney Love and of course, Madonna. Madonna has actually spent her career reinventing herself. She has always been able to find innovative ways of reinventing both her musical stylings and fashion that cannot be compared to anyone else in the industry.

In 1985, she can be seen with armful of bracelets made with rubber, torn shirts, crucifixes, lacy bras, tights and a lot more. After she signed her first singles deal, she was able to take the tattered look mainstream.

In 1990, Jean-Paul Gaultier the French designer, was the one who designed her costume for her Blond Ambition World Tour. Madonna’s look when she wore her iconic cone bustier that Gaultier designed is still her most memorable.

In 1991, she was even able to channel Marilyn Monroe at the Oscar’s with her Bob Mackie dress which was beaded white strapless and body-hugging gown with fur ang formal gloves. She even wore some $20 million worth of diamonds.

Madonna was also able to transform herself into Eva Peron when she played that role in a movie in 1996. She was seen wearing a glamorous Christian Dior dress with red lipstick, her bleached hair pulled back in a knot. She was also able to transform into a geisha and a cowboy. When she became a mother, she was also able to dress herself as a mother. However, as Madonna released her recent albums, she was successfully able to transform herself into a fashionable icon again.

Like Madonna, if you also want to reinvent your life, here are some tips that Madonna has. First, remember that the clothes you wear are one of the most glaring aspects of your lifestyle and personality, so changing them can reinvent your personality.

If you want to reinvent your wardrobe, look first at your lifestyle. Consider your work, for instance. Do you have a 9 to 5 job? Perhaps corporate clothes are a must in your wardrobe. In the same way, casual clothes would fit in if you are a student.

Take out the clutter. Get rid of clothes and accessories you do not need or no longer fits you.

Imagine the person you want to be. From this you can prepare a list of necessary clothes and accessory for your new lifestyle. After that, you can go shopping for the things you need for the new you.

Do not be scared to try new things and looks. You can get ideas on how to go about it from movies, magazines, TV shows, and various media. You can also add a spice of your own personality.

There are some good looks you can try. For example, there is the vintage look which would look good on just about every one. Think of Siena Miller and Kate Moss. Get vintage shoes, clothes, and handbags from thrift stores in your area.

Other looks you can try are Boho Chic which reminds you of Kate Hudson, and the classic look which was popularized by Jackie Onassis.

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Anna Nicole Smith is a prime example of a fact: It’s often later than you think. In her case, she probably did not realize that she would not live to the age of 40. She probably did not attach great importance to having an updated will or estate plan.

However, the latter stage of life is simply not the best time to plan. The best time to engage in estate planning is when you are young and healthy. Then as age sets in, or as life circumstances change, the plan should then be updated.

Anna Nicole Smith’s death, and her estate “plan,” provides instructive lessons for all of us concerning our own estate plans:

Lesson 1: You never know when…

This is self-evident. Barring the autopsy report concluding that her death was a result of suicide, it is doubtful that Smith knew that she would never see her 40th birthday.

This highlights the fact that the best time to engage in estate and financial planning is when we are healthy. Yet, it’s very easy to wait — and to simply not think about it until we have to. But we never really know when that crisis will occur.

Remember: Planning for the future does not make it happen any sooner, or later.

Lesson 2: Keep it current.

Smith’s will shows that it was prepared before two major events in her life: Before the death of her son, Daniel, and before the birth of her daughter, Dannielynn. But her 2001 will made no provision for Dannielynn.

In fact, Smith’s will apparently disinherits any future children, arguably including Dannielynn. The first Article of the will provides that “I have intentionally omitted to provide for my spouse and other heirs, including future spouses and children and other descendents now living and those hereafter born or adopted…”

Little did Smith realize in July 2001, when she executed her will

(1) that her son Daniel would predecease her (he died in late 2006),

(2) that she would give birth to a daughter Dannielynn,

(3) that she would not survive her daughter, and

(4) that the United States Supreme Court would ultimately revive her claim to her late husband’s estate, estimated in the amount of $474 million.

Again, the lesson: Keep your estate plan current.

Lesson 3: An outdated estate plan will have unintended consequences.

Given the language in her will, including the clauses specifically omitting gifts to those not named in the will, it is possible that daughter Dannielynn will not receive any part of Smith’s estate. However, on the other hand, it is also possible (but not certain) that Dannielynn’s rights to the estate might be established through California’s “Pretermission Statute” [Probate Code Section 21620].

It is highly unlikely that Smith truly wanted to disinherit her future daughter when she prepared her will. Unfortunately, however, disinheritance is one possible outcome given the wording of her will. If nothing else, the unnecessary ambiguity almost guarantees extended litigation.

Failing to plan your estate in a timely manner almost guarantees unintended consequences.

Lesson 4: How about your child’s guardian?

One major purpose for having a will is to nominate a guardian for your children. Smith nominated a guardian for Daniel, but of course did not nominate a guardian for her daughter Dannielynn.

Given the fact that paternity will probably be established (from a bevy of potential dads, I might add), the lack of a named guardian will probably not be a problem in Dannielynn’s case.

However, even if your estate is not worth $474 million — and few are — it is still worthwhile to have a will. Most of us will still need to identify a guardian for our children.

And who knows what else life has in store for you? Again, keep it current.

You can meet your financial and estate planning goals! A licensed attorney, financial planner and owner of the San Gabriel Valley financial planning firm Stratton Financial and Estate Planning, Larry D. Stratton is in a position to coach and advise you, and to help you plan for your future. He is also the senior associate at the law firm of Hausman & Sosa, LLP, located in Tarzana, California. He also blogs on estate and financial planning issues at Planner’s Thoughts.

Larry Stratton is a member of the Financial Planning Association, and speaks on estate and financial planning topics in Southern California.