For many years skincare has been the sole preserve of the ladies. After all, men don’t need it, do they?

As I came downstairs to breakfast the other day, my wife stroked my cheek lovingly.

‘Your skin is so soft!’ she said almost wonderingly. ‘I really don’t know how you manage it!’

Now my wife is a dear, dear woman but she thinks that a soft skin is only achievable by using amounts of night cream, day cream, anti-wrinkle cream (not that she has any anyway!), protein cream and just about any other cream that the cosmetic companies can dream up.

She, like many other ladies, is convinced that many men have made a pact with the Prince of Darkness in return for facial skin that is not only soft but free from spots and blemishes. I will probably be marked for use as a bridge support filler or receive a nice pair of concrete overshoes from the League For Excessively Scratchy Chins for revealing the truth but I can contain myself no longer: men really do use skincare products!

There. I’ve said it. What a relief to finally ‘come out’ (about men’s skin, that is). The thing that is different about men’s facial skincare and that used by women is that men don’t pay anywhere near as much for theirs – and that’s because men do something to their faces every day that women never, ever do. They shave.

Now I know women shave their legs and sometimes other unmentionable bits. All we men know that. But they don’t do it every day. So why does that make a difference?

Oh, well, the cat’s out of the bag now so I may as well tell you everything. The act of shaving, when done daily, is an excellent exfoliant. A razor doesn’t only take away the stubble from the chins and cheeks of the average male, it also removes quite a few of the old dermal cells. This tends to leave our homely pans soft and smooth – especially if you use (as an increasing number of today’s guys do) a straight razor.

That’s the reason why – when we’re freshly planed off – the facial skin of your everyday male is as soft as a woman’s that has had enough cream on it to make a raspberry pavlova. The only problem is that it doesn’t last. Hence the tendency in recent years for an increasing number of guys to reach for the bottle.

The skincare-for-men bottle, that is. I’m not convinced that I am the first to have uttered this truth as to the original method of skincare for men – shaving – and doubtless the cosmetic companies’ intelligence task force has been keeping their ear well and truly stuck to the floor over the years. So what do we have now? You got it in one – cream for men.

Oh, they don’t call it ‘cream’. Far too girly. It’s called ‘rejuvenating facial cream’ or something equally crafty – it simply wouldn’t do to call it ‘day cream’ or ‘cool night cream’, would it? It’s done like this. After we men have carefully eradicated all traces of stubble, in proper manly fashion with some horribly sharp steel, we are smiled at from some webpage by an incredible hunk with biceps like footballs and a six-pack made of very large ballbearings who suggests that it would be a good idea to – moisturise our skin!

And do you know what the worst thing about it is? Yep. It works. Guess what I got for Christmas last year? Worse still, guess what I bought recently? Resistance, as has been said, was futile.

The male skincare culture steamroller is gathering momentum. We poor males, hapless victims of our own primitive but effective skincare method, have been sucked into mainstream skincare by forces we can hardly comprehend. What happened to the good old days when the only perfume men wore was good, honest sweat and we all changed our socks once a week even if they were reasonably pong-free? When boxer shorts were things boxers wore and after-shave lotion was considered only fit for wearing on a hot date?

Don’t know about you but I sure thank my lucky stars they’re firmly in the past! Now where’s my anti-aging wrinkle-destroying masculine protein emollient?

Steve Dempster is a recent and happy convert to modern men’s skincare and doesn’t mind anymore who knows it. Learn more here about shaving and skincare products for men.

If you’ve found this article, I have to assume that you either strongly suspect or know for sure that your spouse has had an affair. I know from experience that in all likelihood you’re experiencing a slew of overwhelming feelings (likely none of them positive) like betrayal, shock, severe hurt, and intense pain. You may also blame yourself, wonder how you could have been so naive, or blame your spouse entirely for his or her actions.  Every single one of these questions and responses are perfectly natural and normal.  You’ve been dealt a harsh blow and there is no right or wrong answer. The days following learning about an affair can go by in a daze or the blink of an eye and it’s easy to feel overwhelmed or lost.  This article will provide tips and prompts to help you deal with these feelings and sort out / deal with the affair.

Don’t Blame Yourself, Beat Yourself Up Or Second Guess Yourself: Until an affair actually happened to me, I used to wonder how in the world a wife could blame herself for a husband’s affair.  I just did not get that at all.  But then, in the days after my husband’s affair (once my shock and rage at him wore off) I started to wonder where in the world I went wrong. How could I be so stupid? Was I not exciting enough? Pretty enough? Sexy enough? A good enough wife and mother? Did I not meet his needs or give him what he needed to be happy? Did he have to go elsewhere for excitement or satisfaction?

I have a friend who kind of went through this same sort of thing but in the opposite realm. When she found out about her husband’s affair – she completed overcompensated. She wanted this thing fixed immediately so she sucked it up and put all of the blame squarely on her shoulders and made drastic changes to herself and her bedroom.  The “crises mode” of the situation actually created a spark between her and her husband. Then, she hated herself because she felt that she was a “door mat” for just wanting her husband back. She asked herself where was her self respect? How could she allow him to do this? So she felt negatively about herself just as I did and her self esteem was hit as hard as mine was, but for different reasons.

Both of these reactions cause all sorts of internal bad feelings that doesn’t help you heal at all. Although these feelings are so perfectly normal and understandable it’s important to understand that no matter what you did or didn’t do – the affair is not your fault. It just is not.  Your spouse is the one who made the decision to be unfaithful.  Whether he / she is going through a mid life crises or he / she thinks their needs are not being met or he’s / she’s having self esteem issues, how they chose to deal with these problems was a decision that THEY made.

There are many spouses with issues who chose not to cheat but to instead communicate and work with their wives and husbands to work through these issues.

When You Are Ready, Evaluate And Understand Exactly Why The Infidelity Happened And Your Feelings On What You Want To Happen Now: I will always maintain that a spouse who cheats is the guilty party.  However, each marriage has certain factors that can sometimes contribute to infidelity.  This is not always the case. Sometimes it’s a simple self esteem issue or stress manifesting itself, but sometimes there can be issues in a marriage or communication style that contributes to infidelity. 

Whether you want to save the marriage or not, it can be helpful to hear (when you are calm and ready) just exactly why the infidelity happened.  However, you don’t have to take these reasons for face value.  Really listen to what your spouse is saying and honestly evaluate if these issues they’re bringing up have any merit or are valid. 

Sometimes, a spouse will just make excuses or refuse to take responsibility, but sometimes, you will actually get the truth as painful as it may be.  In my own case, my husband was not feeling heard in a highly stressful situation.  At first I thought this was all just a silly excuse, but when I evaluated more honestly and closely, I had to admit there was a few slivers of truth there.

What you chose to do with this information is completely up to you.  If you don’t want to save the marriage, at least it is a learning experience that you may revisit later in a future relationship.  If you do want to save the marriage, this information will be invaluable for you in the future so that you can address these things to make the marriage stronger and ensure the infidelity doesn’t reoccur.

Now, it’s important that you really take some honest time on your own when you can be calm and reflective (this may take time) to determine what you really want.  It may be that your spouse has been a good one up until this point and you still love him or her and ultimately want to save the marriage. Or, it may be that a pattern of betrayal and dishonestly is emerging that is a deal breaker for you.  Either answer is valid and OK.

Define what is your best case scenario that, if you could achieve it, would help you heal. For some, this is to just pick up and move on by yourself, without letting this one event ruin the rest of your life.  For some, it’s to get the marriage back to a loving and trusting place. Whatever your “best case scenario” is, always promise yourself that you will keep this in mind from this point forward.

Because if ultimately you want to save your marriage, then it doesn’t make sense to continue to lash out at your spouse and continue to punish them months and months after they’ve said they’re sorry or allow an unhealthy obsession with everything having to do with the affair (or the other woman) to continue to sabotage your marriage and your happiness. If being happily married and at peace again is really your goal, try your best not to engage in behaviors that are going to keep this from happening (while still being true to yourself.)

Don’t Hesitate To Get Help To Deal With The Infidelity If You Need It: An affair can be heavy burden on the party who was cheated on. Your self esteem is likely going to take a huge hit. Although it may feel weird to do so, take this time to focus on yourself and your extreme self care.  See friends. Pursue those things you love.  Do what makes you happy.  This will make you feel better and will show both you and your spouse that you have enough self respect that this isn’t going to beat you. 

You may ultimately need some to help with your healing and with dealing with the infidelity.  In my own experience, although I wanted to save my marriage and to forgive my husband, I was stuck.  I would feel forgiving toward him one second and rage at him the next.  He was patient with me and I was trying to be patient with him, but we couldn’t move forward. 

It’s normal to have difficulty in the early days after learning about the affair, but if you get stuck and can’t move past it, don’t hesitate to get the help you need. There is no shame in it.  Ultimately, I needed out side resources to get me out of this cycle that was just holding me back.  Once I had this, I was able to slowly move forward and today, although it took some work and effort, I can honestly say it hasn’t beaten me in the least.

Dealing with the infidelity in my marriage was very difficult for a time. With a lot hard work and effort, our marriage and my self esteem recovered. I now know myself, my husband and my marriage much more intimately. I no longer worry that he is going to cheat again. You can read my very personal story on my blog at http://saving-my-marriage-after-the-affair.blogspot.com/

One of the lingerie items every woman needs is a bra. At the Lingerie Exposure eBay store you can find a wide diversity of brands, designs, and color to please even the pickiest persons. One can get a bra or a set comprising of a bra and matching panties, bikinis or briefs. Lingerie in general and bras and sets in particular seem to be the preferred gift especially for certain holidays like Valentine’s Day, Mother’s Day, or Christmas. They are also one of the number one gifts men give women when they celebrate the couple’s anniversary.

If the black or red lingerie is considered a classic but yet very sexy, the bras and sets can be chosen according to the buyer preferences or the beneficiary preferences. If the material and the color can be nice even if they are not the most wanted by the beneficiary, the size is the one that matters the most. If you decide to buy a bra or a bra and panties set you should make sure you know the exact size. For a man there is nothing more embarrassing than buying the wrong size of lingerie for his loved one. One should not be satisfied with guessing or approximating the size.

There are different ways to find the size of a bra. Of course the easiest one is to go to a store and try one. But what happens if the one you like is available only online? Looking at the size of the bras you already have might not be very helpful because bras are made in different countries and they have different ways of sizing their products. However the most common bra conversion charts offer sizes from the United States, the United Kingdom, Australia, France and Italy.

A conversion chart is available online and offers information about the cup size and the band size. However in order to be able to use it you must know your size at least in one of the countries sizing methods. If the cup is the same at almost all sizes in all countries, the band size differs according to the system measured used. For example in the United States the band size is given in inches while in Europe is given in centimeters.

A bra conversion chart is very important when you purchase the bras online. They are not only important for the bras, but also for the bustier or other pieces of lingerie that cover your breasts. Most of the online stores that offer famous brands lingerie like Victoria’s secret, Felina, Lily of France, Wacoal or Warner’s offer size charts and measurement formulas so that you can get the size you usually wear without actually trying on the product. Of course most of the times the items bought online like the ones purchased from the stores have a return period and can either refund you or send you the right size of bra that you actually need.

Jessica and Alan Katz own Lingerie Exposure. Get the styles you want at the prices you’ll love. http://www.LingerieExposure.com